leaving on a jet plane; or how i almost missed my flight: a timeline

10:00am wed - book a flight home
1:00pm wed - call AA to change flight, talk to nicest person ever who waves $150 fee
5:45pm - leave work
7:00pm - start packing
9:00pm - head to bed
wake up at 1:45am,  2:45am,  3:45am, and 4:45am 
5:45am - alarm finally goes off
6:35am - pray on the way downstairs that i can find a cab -- He sends 4 just in case I miss one
7:00am - arrive LGA and get boarding pass - glance at it quickly, head to gate D5
7:10am - get to gate
7:15-8:00am - Wait wait wait read People listen to Beyonce wait annoyed
8:15am - why haven't we boarded yet? Flight in 15 mins
8:17am stop listening to Beyonce long enough to hear the plane at the gate where I'm sitting is going to MIAMI
8:18am annoyed at the miami plane - why can't they get their own gate?
8:20am glance at boarding pass and realize i'm AT THE WRONG GATE
8:20am wrong gate!!!!!! THEY'RE GOING TO LEAVE ME
8:20am hightail it to gate D3
8:21am gate attendant tells me they've been paging me. Paging me! I'm the girl who got paged!  and if I hadn't listened to single ladies on repeat I might have heard my name on the LOUDSPEAKER!
8:22am board plane; everyone is staring at me
8:23am want to announce that am not late, actually very early. I blame Beyonce.
8:25am still can't find spot for bag - overhead compartments full.  wait for flight attendant.
8:26am man behind me keeps giving me the "you're irresponsible" look
8:26am flight attendant's very nice, do they know why I'm going home or are they just nice?
8:27am find spot for bag
8:28am lug bag to overhead compartment... accidentally hit man with dirty look on head
8:28am want to tell him karma sucks, keep dirty looks to self but instead smile and apologize politely like a good southern girl
8:29am buckle up
8:30am plane takes off

.....WHEW!