healer.

a couple of weeks ago my friend ellie told me about this song by hillsong that i needed to listen to. i'm a big hillsong fan; they're my go-to band (are they a band? the whole hillsong thing kinda confuses me) when i'm in the mood for some good worship songs. i mean, it's impossible to not love lyrics like "i'm believing, trusting in creative Hands" and, "everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades...never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame" and "I called You answered, and You came to my rescue..." and "arrested by your truth and righteousness, your grace has overwhelmed my brokenness"(from Devotion, From the Inside Out, Came to My Rescue, and To Know Your Name, respectively).

the new song, which will be on their new CD This is Our God, is called Healer. it's a good one.

The story behind the song can be found here.

The lyrics of the song bring me back to a conversation i had last week with my best friend. she and i talked about how we're all broken and in need of healing. this isn't a new concept, i've written about it before and it's certainly been the topic of many a conversation. but she brought up a point that had never crossed my mind. she said that we know God can heal our wounds and turn them into scars, but why aren't we asking God to heal our scars? better yet, why aren't we sure He can?

we interact with people according to our wounds (past hurts we've not healed from yet) and scars (past hurts we're healed from, but have left an evident mark on us). we choose our friends and those we surround ourselves with according to where we've been and the different types of pain we've experienced and endured. we make our pasts our platforms - our jumping off points. we talk about our pasts as if they are still part of us - and i know they are, but what if they don't have to be? what if we allow Him to remove our scars as well?

I'm beginning to believe that part of grace might be in forgetting. I believe that my past doesn't have to be my platform.

I want to give him my wounds and my scars and be completely healed. i no longer want "visible" reminders of where i've been, mistakes i've made, ways i've been wronged or hurt. i want God's grace to extend to that part of me too - the scarred part. i want to believe that it can extend to the depths of me and even beyond that.

though i'm not sure where i heard it, in high school one of my favorite quotes was "God can mend a broken heart, but you have to give Him all the pieces." i didn't really know what a broken heart looked like then (or at least not the way i do now), but maybe it's time for me to take it a step further and ask him to heal the cracks and fissures that remain in the aftermath of the brokenness.